Why surrogacy?
It started about 10 years ago, I saw a family member of mine struggle to get pregnant and was never able to carry any children to term. Even as a young teen this made me very sad for her because at that point in my life I knew I wanted children and could only imagine how hard it would be if I could not have any. About two years later as she continued to struggle, at the time knowing nothing of surrogacy, I heard some one mention it and I started to educate myself on it and at that point decided that this is some thing I would do for her and others if I was able to have children. Another 2 years go by and I found out I am pregnant, although at 18 I am not ready to have a child I am very excited to become a mom. Happiness quickly turns to heartbreak when I go to the hospital for bleeding and he tells me that I'm losing the baby. At that moment I knew a little of what she had gone through all those times of heartbreak, and at that moment I knew that I had to be a surrogate.
Are you going to be able to do it?
This is a pretty common question, most people like to ask me if I am going to be able to do this with out being emotionally attached. This is a hard one for me to explain. I would be lying if I said that I wouldn't have some sort of attachment to the child that I am going to carry but the attachment I will have is not going to be the same I had with my daughter. I know that this child is not mine that I am just the person who is helping to give someone this precious life that they wouldn't have other wise. So yes, I know that I will be able to do this and I know what I am doing is great.
Are you doing it for the money? How much compensation do you get?
The short answer is no, I am not doing it for the money. When I first started thinking about becoming a surrogate I honestly didn't know that I would get compensated for doing it, I just wanted to do it help the people who can't have children on our own. The money is the very last thing I care about and I get very offended when I get asked this question.
I will not answer how much in compensation I get but for those of you considering becoming a surrogate they do cover all expenses involved with the process.
What does your husband think?
At first when I brought up the idea of being a surrogate he didn't like it at all. After sitting down with him and telling him why I wanted to do it he started to open up about the idea and the more I talked about it the more comfortable he felt with it. He supports me 100% in this decision and will be there for me every step of the way.
Do you want to be in the child's life?
Yes, in certain ways. I would like to receive pictures and occasional updates on the child, this is something I am going to be looking for in the couple that I choose to help. I wouldn't be opposed to meeting the child in the future if that's what they want, but I in no way want to impose on their lives.
Aren't you nervous?
Yes, this is something completely new so there are a few things I am nervous about.
- The first one is flying! I have to fly out to California three times during this process and I am terrified of flying.
- The second one is meeting the parents we choose. I'm afraid that they will not like us or we will not like them. All thought the screening process pretty much eliminates this from happening it is still a makes me nervous.
- The third one is all the shots. All though I am not afraid of needles the thought of daily shots in the stomach and shots in the hip from my husband makes me a little nervous, haha.
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